blank space // best of both worlds // I'm going to double major probably

It's hard when no one plays you back on rapchat.
It's hard when people ask you what you do all day
and you don't even know.
time is slipping into everyone's broken AC vents
I sit here and watch TV and waste away everyday because it's to cold to do anything else.
I mostly do what everyone else is doing
I'm a sheep.
So?
All I ever do anymore is take those personality buzz feed quizzes that tell you nothing/everything about yourself.
Were all just trying to figure ourselves out.
My professor said something the other day in my Humanities class,
to define yourself is to limit yourself.
So I'm not a sheep.
But I am sometimes, most times, a lot of times.
But I am other stuff too.
I'm a soccer player and a sister and a virgo.
I'm a writer (?) and a rapper and a big cry baby,
I am strong even if I don't feel it and I am weak whenever I start to think I'm not.
I can't believe I'm talking about myself in another blog post
But its so important.
Your young adult life is when you are supposed to figure yourself out and choose your major and choose your life
But if you choose the you can't choose something else.
To define yourself is to limit yourself
You identify as an introvert so now you feel like you can't go up and talk to that cool person you want to be friends with because you are shy and awkward and that's not what introverts do.
CAN'T
CAN'T
CAN'T.
My question is who's making these rules?
Who's stopping you?
You aren't unable
You don't have to wait until someone comes up to you first,
nothing is physically stopping you.
You can do anything you want to do and not do anything you don't want to do. So don't make excuses. Don't say you are unable. It all just depends on how much you want something.
Do you want to make friends or do you want to be comfortable?
You don't realize it but you are putting restrictions on your actions.
One second you are everything and anything and this vast person but once you start putting those labels on name tag you start chipping off other parts of yourself.
You're funny so you can't be serious, you're optimistic so you can't be sad
you're going to business school so you can't like art.
you aren't two dimensional.
you're a person with layers and depth and complexities and you can be both sides of everything. You don't know why you do the things you do half the time you just do them. You don't need to explain yourself to anyone, even yourself.